Sermon

There is nothing in life that comes easy. Yet, the heartening part is that your problems in the future are not going to be the same. What you are facing now might look way tougher and complex than what you went through earlier. But, what you gonna face in the future will be totally different from your earlier experiences. Hence, all you can do now is to collect experiences of different sorts. May be you get a chance to apply them later.. May be you don’t. But what’s important is these experiences will harden you up. Help you brace up for the future. Talking does not help. Silence is also not golden. Measure your words.

Procrastination

Both lit up, using the same matchstick.

“Remember, why they say not to light three cigarettes with one flame?”

“It has something to do with the World War I. Sorry, that’s all I can remember. Manning these posts for years has done no good to my thirst for knowledge. Remember, how good I used to be in History in school?”

“How did we end up like this? Remember, our extravagant plans about revolutionizing the psychedelic rock scene?”

“Procrastination. We ought to have treated this mandatory military service as a halt; rather, we made a career out of it.”

P.S. This is totally inspired by Madison’s 100 word prompt. And, linked to Austere Alacrity, till I figure out the precise rules. :D

What does a man do?

You sit on your bean bag since 6:15pm. You are expecting a call or at least a message. You know this will be an important call. And fof that you skip your gym routine too. “What if she calls while at the gym?”

Boredom grips you. Eventually. You talk to your mom. Ask her inane stuff. Basically, try and prolong the call. You just want to talk sometimes. Some days, when you are living alone in an alien city, are such days. “Why are you so much on the phone?” she, the significant she and not my mom, would ask when I initially moved to Hyderabad. The answer lies in living alone.

But the call does not come through. You would ideally like to tear your hair out. But you decide to talk. Two of your closest buddies are in the US. Sort of…the brothers you never had. You call them. Both are tied up in lectures.

You, then, browse through the phonebook. Nope, no one you can really ‘talk’ to. Not even Jerky. He never really understood my predicament.

It’s already four hours of idleness now. So, you do what a man got to do.

Gulp two cans of beer in fifteen minutes and write this post from your cellphone.

Talking Literally #3

“You know you have always had the potential, right? Why have you been so inexplicably lazy then? It is time you took the leap and enter in to a bright new world.”

Phil was on the phone with his girlfriend for an hour and was lying face down on the railing of his 12th floor balcony all the while. Then… he took the leap.

East Lawn Florists

“Hi, Did you send me a bouquet?”

“Err… Yes, I did.”

“Fuck, man!”

“Appreciate the effort at least..hehe” 

“How much did it cost you?! And, who the fuck writes ‘Why this Kolaveri Di’ on a bouquet?” …And, she thundered.

I leave you with a song and not Kolaveri Di, but a song whose background vocals are fantastic. 

And, I know it is gooey, romantic sorts… couldn’t help it though.

Talking Literally#2

Steven and Maria met for the first time almost a decade back. In business school.

Steven was of Chinese-American descent and Maria was Portuguese. They both met at the World Business School, Paris, while pursuing their MBA in finance.

Although they had worked together on several projects/ case studies while at the school, they had hardly known each other. Both of them had the most coveted finance jobs after graduating from World Business School and were positioned at Geneva now.

They first got friendly while working at the same firm. Love blossomed and soon Maria was moving in to stay with Steven in his apartment.

And, then in a couple of months Maria was pregnant with Steven’s baby.

Now, Maria’s parents were strict Catholics. So, when they were apprised of the pregnancy, they were furious with rage. Maria was their only child and they had raised her in a very strict Catholic way, while at the same time, providing her with the best of education possible.

The mayhem that ensued created a rift between Maria and Steven eventually. They decided to go their separate ways.

Maria’s parents got her married to a decent, educated Catholic business man settled in Geneva.

Steven, in the meanwhile, got married to this lovely lady from the same office.

However, Steven and Maria, both, just could not do away with their feelings and working in the same office did not help matters.

Over the course of next five years, their marriages fell apart…well technically, just Steven’s. Steven’s wife separated immediately after their baby was born. Steven and Maria had by then decided to quit their day jobs to start a business magazine. This was too much for his wife to handle, other than the regular night trysts Steven and Maria were having. So, she decided to file for separation and go stay in a distant, serene locality to raise the child.

Maria’s husband, on the other hand, was way too engrossed in his business to care about his wife.

Becoming business partners helped their relationship flourish like never before. They had their share of arguments and fights…but always on business ideas. Never on the state of their relationship. And whatever arguments they had always got settled the same day in office. Or, the same night in bed.

This went on for two years till Steven received an offer from the most prestigious business newspaper from the Wall Street to head their newspaper. Steven desperately wanted to return to the US. After all, he was born there and his entire family was settled there.

But he was also torn between his love for Maria and his choice for a career with the world’s greatest business newspaper. Sensing Steven’s dichotomy, Maria hardened up. In the first instance, she was disgusted to know that Steven was even giving this job offer a thought. She expected him to stay back in Geneva, run the magazine together and continue with their affair. So, when Steven told her that he had to send the newspaper guys a reply in a week, she was heartbroken.

To make him jealous she started flirting with the new editor of their magazine, Michael. Michael was suave, educated and he had a way with words. His mere presence was electric. This did not go unnoticed by Steven at all.

On the eve of the ‘d-day’, Steven came back home to find Maria in his bed. She was reading a book, Bill Bryson’s The Lost Continent: Travels in Small-Town America. Her long, lustrous hair was covering just the right amount of her fulsome bra-less bosom. She had pulled up the quilt up to her waist. Her pierced navel was peeping through the pages of the book resting on her flat midriff.

They were not looking at each other directly yet. Though they were aware of each other’s presence in the room. Steven gathered a chair from around a corner of the room and sat beside the bed. Finally, Maria gave up the façade and looked up to say, ‘What’s up?’

Steven gazed for a couple of seconds, and then pulled his trousers down.

They enjoyed this session like never. Probably, the best they had ever had. And, once it was over and Maria cuddled up to fall asleep in Steven’s arms, he strangulated her with a pillow.

Steven had decided to take up the new job at New York and he did not want Maria to be cozying up to any other man here in Geneva.

Karma’s a bitch, really?

Jerky: Fucker, I haven’t got any new marriage alliances over the past six months.

Captain Haddock: Karma is a bitch. You played around with people’s lives for 7-8 years. Now this is what you gonna face!

Jerky: But, why are you faced with all this if karma’s a bitch?! You have been the nicest guy I have ever met.

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Jerky’s my fuckin’ best friend and whenever he says this I resort to the song below. Well this is not a version from one of their albums, don’t listen to it if you are one of those original song suckers.